A new neighbor moved into our compound with his newly married wife.
These people were busy displaying love everywhere!
On the staircase…
In the car…
Outside the compound…
On the road…
At this point, I started feeling pressure.
I said to myself, “Before my wife starts comparing our marriage to these people’s romantic Olympics, let me upgrade my game.”
So, I came home and met my wife in the kitchen, tying her wrapper as usual.
I quietly tiptoed past her like a secret agent.
I entered our bedroom and transformed it into what I thought was a romantic paradise.
I changed the white bulbs to red.
Scattered red and white flowers everywhere.
Placed red candles around the bed.
Even arranged some candles in the middle of the rug like a movie scene.
Then I removed my clothes and wore my finest red-and-white trousers to match the atmosphere.
I was still arranging a bottle of wine and a bouquet of flowers when my wife suddenly opened the bedroom door.
She fr*ze.
Looked around.
Looked at me.
Looked at the candles.
Looked at me again.
Then screamed:
“JESUS!!! So you’ve finally joined a ritual cult?!”
Before I could explain anything, she dashed out of the room like she had seen a ghost.
I ran after her.
“Babe! Stop! I can explain!”
I rushed outside shirtless, wearing only my red-and-white trousers.
What I didn’t realize was that I was still holding one of the red candles in my hand.
My wife zoomed past our new neighbors.
A few seconds later, they saw me chasing after her…
Shirtless.
Wearing red trousers.
Holding a red candle.
Running like a possessed village chief.
The husband shouted:
“RUN!!! HE’S COMING FOR THE NEXT SACRIFICE!”
Immediately, both of them removed their shoes and joined my wife in the marathon.
Now, my wife, her family, the new neighbors, three elders from the compound, one prayer warrior, and a pastor have gathered for over TWO HOURS.
Everybody is receiving marriage counseling because of my “romantic surprise.”
Meanwhile, the wine is still in the bedroom, the candles have melted, and the flowers have died waiting for romance.
See how my surprise love package landed me in trouble
