Back in school, for many of us, running through the corridors during recess might be the norm, with teachers often urging us to sit down and pick up a book. Surely many of us can recall being among those who eventually succumbed to their persuasion…
Some decades were over and the scene has shifted. Nowadays, it’s common to find school staff encouraging kids to be active during recess, with some teachers even confiscating books if they notice a student engrossed in reading.
This was the case for Reddit user u/iguessimthatdad‘s 11-year-old daughter.
The concerned dad took to Reddit’s ‘Am I The A*****e‘ thread to share the story of his daughter, Cleo, who is in the 5th grade and has ADHD.
He wrote:
“My daughter, Cleo (11) is very active outside of school. She plays soccer, takes swim lessons and will play outside a lot with neighborhood kids. She’s very social. Most of her friends are from outside of school.
At school, however, she struggles making friends. Cleo has ADHD and was bull!ed in 3rd and 4th grade for some of that. While it was brought under control by 5th (current grade), these kids still don’t play with her and pretty much ice her out. While I don’t think they have to play with her, it also means that she doesn’t socialize a lot at school. She’s okay with this.
Her teacher says our daughter often plays alone at recess or reads. My wife and I were not very concerned and explained she’s very social and active afterwards.
Cleo is a huge reader. She’s currently reading her way through my wife’s collection of books from her childhood. She loves them and treasures them, knowing they were her mama’s and wants to take great care of them. She came home on Tuesday, very upset and worried her mom would be upset with her. I asked why and she said her teacher took her book away and won’t give it back until tomorrow. When pressed for more information , she said she was reading at recess. Her teacher walked over, took the book and told her to go play. My daughter begged for her book back and the teacher refused.
I quickly assured Cleo that she wasn’t in trouble and even called my wife at work to have her back me up. It was quite concerning that she was so afraid, as my wife isn’t one to fly off the handle. She’s always gentle with Cleo. As suspected, my wife assured her she wasn’t upset and that Cleo did zero wrong.
The next day, I brought Cleo to school early and walked her to class, no one but the teacher was there. I told the teacher to give me the book. She obliged and tried to defend herself. I told her to save it and she had no right. There is no rule that Cleo has to do physical activity at recess and we expressed no concern. The teacher said she was allowed to set boundaries for her class but I pointed out recess was free time. It’s not like Cleo is reading during math. We went back and forth, and finally I said I’d be reaching out to the principal.
The issue was resolved quickly. I don’t know the particulars, except the principal told me that Cleo is allowed to read at recess and unless she is actively harming someone or reading during a non-designated time, she wouldn’t have any more books confiscated. My wife and I were pleased. Cleo even more so.
My cousin is a teacher at this school, just a different grade. She says what I did is “hot gossip” in the teacher’s lounge and that I have been marked as “one of those parents”. She says the teacher isn’t paid enough and I should’ve just accepted the rule. When I pointed out we only have 2 more months left at this school (Cleo is our only and starts junior high in august), that’s not a concern.
My wife and I feel justified, but we are wondering if I’m an asshole?”
In the comments section, many other users expressed their opinions on the matter, and people were overwhelmingly in support of the father.
One person wrote: “Why is this woman a teacher if she doesn’t want children to read in their free time? The only time I’ve ever had a teacher complaining about me reading in my free time was during our The Scarlet Letter reading my Junior year. Her complaint was that I was way too far ahead of the rest of the class and needed to stop before I got to the end and wasn’t interested in class discussion anymore.”
Someone else added: “How can you actively discourage reading and call yourself a teacher????”
A further user chimed in with: “You gave your kid the message: we have your back […] You gave your daughter the message that it is okay to be herself. To spend her ‘me-time’ the way SHE wants to. It is a powerful message and who cares what the teacher’s lounge thinks of that.”
